Although our new house build hasn't officially started yet because we're still working on the price and a few small changes, I've started to lose a bit of sleep. I realized this morning after waking up from a night of bad dreams, that I'm scared.
Of what, I'm not exactly sure.
Maybe the fact that we'll go from being 4 minutes from everything to being 10 minutes. Maybe the fact that we've never built before and have heard so many horror stories about builders and shoddy work. Maybe the fact that we are almost mortgage free and we may now have a mortgage, even just for a short time. Maybe the fact that we've lived in this house for 22 years and know every nook and cranny. Maybe the fact that we can literally walk around here in the dark and no exactly where everything is. Maybe the fact that some of our kids were born here and some even died here.
We know we've outgrown this house. We know that with our oldest daughter living her for at least the next 5 to 6 years while she finishes university, we all need our own spaces and our grandson will need his own bedroom as he gets older. We know that any debit we take on will be easy to pay off within a short time. We know that the frustration we feel now with literally two households in space meant for one will disappear. We know that we will enjoy landscaping from scratch and having space for a large vegetable garden to feed our family and reduce our food costs. We know that moving into a house that won't need any renovations for many years will free up time for us to enjoy living instead of always trying to make this house work.
We know in the end, it is the right move.
So why, oh why, am I so scared??
2 comments:
Change is scary, especially when it involves your home. Nothing great ever happened without change - what you are feeling is entirely natural.
I agree. I also was thinking about how it may affect how I do my job currently as I'm so close to my office now that it's easy to pop over to do some work or tell a family I can meet them for a counseling session. Once I'm home, out in the country, I won't be coming back in to town at night for meetings, groups and counseling sessions, at least during the winter. So it will take some juggling to make all that work. On the other hand, I want to be home at night in the winter, so it may be the solution to changing my schedule to better meet my needs instead of my clients. Ooooh, did I just say that out loud!!
Thank you for your calming words. I truly appreciate them!
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